Thursday, April 15, 2010

Day 96 – Telephone

Day 96 – Did you ever play the game of telephone? You know – one person starts to tell a secret in someone's ear, then they pass it on and inevitably leave parts out or exaggerate what they thought they heard. Then the last person repeats what was said to them and it really has nothing to do with the original secret or statement.

When I was a teen, I decided after one too many secrets getting out that I would not tell anyone anything that I didn't care about getting back around in some way. I tried not to talk behind people's backs and I didn't tell any secret that I didn't care would be let out. You tell one person and ask them not to tell and then it ALWAYS comes out somewhere.

I have been badly burned by secrets along the way and have been very hurt by them being shared often behind my back. That is why I will NOT ever do that to someone else. If someone tells me a secret – I do not share unless I have their permission to do so. Too many things can be misconstrued and inevitably hurt someone else. It leaves a feeling of betrayal and triggers other things from my past where I have felt violated and THAT is the reason why I won't do that to someone else.

I really thought long and hard about this today and how Jesus must have felt knowing Judas would betray and "out" him in those final hours. Here was a friend and companion that turned Jesus over for 30 silver coins. Now, we know that it HAD to happen that way – but the real human emotion that is involved with that has to be a feeling of betrayal. We often don't see and feel the emotion that Jesus had but he had human emotion. He had to hurt even though he understood what was about to happen. He was not void of those feelings.

Matthew 27:1-5
1Early in the morning, all the chief priests and the elders of the people came to the decision to put Jesus to death. 2They bound him, led him away and handed him over to Pilate, the governor.
 3When Judas, who had betrayed him, saw that Jesus was condemned, he was seized with remorse and returned the thirty silver coins to the chief priests and the elders. 4"I have sinned," he said, "for I have betrayed innocent blood."
      "What is that to us?" they replied. "That's your responsibility."
 5So Judas threw the money into the temple and left. Then he went away and hanged himself

I know that I would not hurt someone to that degree – however, their heart may feel betrayed and violated if I opened my mouth even with good intentions behind it. I pray that I can emerge from my telephone experiences and know that God ultimately will carry me even when my heart has been broken and hurt.

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